Poems

If only I were perfect in each and every way,

If only I were perfect each and every day,

The person who judged me imperfect in my way,

Would beat retreat and ‘ner return any other day.

I would be the best and most successful others they would say,

And compliments and admiration each day they would pay,

But each day that person who judged me would never go away,

Each day I got more perfect in each and every way,

The impossible standard this person everyday they would call,

And each and everyday to them I gave all,

But still i got more perfect but louder they would call,

Shoulda, coulda, supposed been better than them all.

Such standard from this voice that came still higher to attain,

Never was i happy as I strove to attain,

What would become of me if perfect I was not,

No love would come ‘cos I was not as perfect as could be

and I would be left with my heart and stomach in knot perpetually

Each day I tried so very hard to be better

than the previous me,

Cos id be only loved for the perfect other me.

Days and weeks and months went past and years still further very fast,

More and more perfect as I could be,

I felt no love however perfect I be,

I wished to be a flower as perfect can be,

that everyone who came would be in awe of me,

This day a butterfly alighted on me,

And said to me no better person I would wish to be,

With your beautiful smile and radiance I see,

definitely be you’d be a better me,

But how could that be, you are more beautiful than me,

The flowers you see and places you be,

How intelligent you are and loving you be,

You certainly are more perfect than me.

Said the butterfly to me,

Those people who never perfect enough be,

took flawed learning you see,

Looked out into you and into me,

From a heart which pained to see,

what imperfection has got into me,

that imperfection and flaw is all I see,

I then realised that person was me,

who drove me to perfection it never could see,

and me whose perfection I could never see,

and the butterfly said I get it, i see,

God made everything as perfect as you and me,

The truth of which I couldn’t see,

My value and worth and perfection as me

was never about how much I could be,

and I was my own worst enemy,

Such awful turmoil I put myself through,

only to try to be perfect as you,

and to realise it was true that I was as perfect as to do what God had made incomparable with you,

that what I am is beyond compare not to mention my beautiful hair,

and what we all are is beyond compare,

Perfect in a way that God finds fair and not in any way that humans compare,

Such knowledge I now knew I stopped trying to be you,

and in that new knowing I felt complete,

that no more did I ever need compete,

With efforts and struggles now begone,

Gods gifts which made just for me,

were now able to set free,

no more I judge myself perfect not,

The person inside who said they were me

who behaved ever so critically

wants to live

happily ever after with me you see

together we live in happy glee,

that I was born to be perfectly me,

and how good it felt happily just being me.